Thursday, May 15, 2008

bigger existential supermarkets

"but usually if I'm sitting there without reading, I am a divided person"

Yesterday I spent a lot of time reading John Blofeld. He held my attention in Taoist mode and my body and mind were thus calm. Later I did some web design work and that gave some more easy, non-egoic time.

So: cute ways of being non-egoic; noble (?) distractions. Watering the good seeds or at least not watering the bad ones. Keeping the mind free of those negative thought patterns that have become habit energies and which pull me down.

But: the negatives are not to be totally avoided. The idea is to get into a calm and positive frame of mind and then to look into the negative habit energies to see their causes and conditions and thus what lessons might be learned.

There is an enormous existential gulf between 'thinking' and 'noticing what is being thought ': especially when the thought is attached to feelings and thus to body reactions:  and they always are.

Aha: I notice the mind toying with various thought trains but not having decided to fully hop on board any of them. Seemingly spoiled for choice. But it is a limited choice relative to what is truly available. There is the phenomenal v the numinous. More choice of phenomena (bigger supermarkets) - so what? More numinous moments - neat.

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